When the mother's death is imminent, the daughters will be allowed in. They will be able to stroke her hair, rub her back, speak words of comfort. "It's OK, Mom. You can go now. We will be all right because you raised us to be strong. It's time for you to rest."
But that time is not this time, and so the daughters go about the mundane tasks of life. Laundry. Bills. Taxes. Walking the dog. All the while wishing only that they could be with their mother, holding her hand, even if she didn't know they were there, which she probably wouldn't.
My mother lies alone in hospice. My sister and I cannot visit. We are doing laundry instead, waiting for the phone call that will finally allow us to hold her hand.
My heart aches for you & Laura. This time is crucial time for all involved. How important it is to be able to spend quiet moments with a loved one before the imminence of finality lurks over your shoulder. I’m so sorry this is happening.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Cathy. It's been really hard this weekend, without work to distract my thoughts. (Ha! I finally found one good thing about working!) ;-) <3
DeleteThis is such a crazy time. Here I thought March and April would get back to “normal”. We have a friend who is so sad that her dad will celebrate his 77 birthday alone. I can’t even imagine your sadness, confusion and pain. You and your sister are in my thoughts and prayers. ❤️������
ReplyDelete"Normal." What is that, even? The thing that keeps me from making this all about me is that I am not the only one who is being kept away from a loved one. It is the best thing, but it is the hardest thing.
DeleteSo saddened to hear this. Love you always, pam
ReplyDeleteThank you! <3
DeleteHow devastating for you, your sister, and your mom at a time like this. Sending love ❤️
ReplyDeleteThanks, Deb. So glad we have each other and our extended support group of family and friends to lean on at this time. <3
DeleteThere are no words to express my heartfelt sadness for you and your family. Know that you are surrounded by so many friends who are by your side at this time. I'm sure your mom knows how much you love her and want to be with her. My heart breaks for you. Ali, Rachel and I send all our love to all your "Loves".
ReplyDeleteI do not know the feeling of not being able to be in the room with someone I love who is in hospice, but i do know saying the words..."It is OK to go now as heaven is waiting for you and so is grandpa." saying them with tears of course. I am glad you are there with your sister.
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